In Part 1, we learned about the Islamic teachings of family relationships. In this article, we will learn about the characteristics of toxic family members and how to deal with such toxicity in our lives.
Part 2: Characteristics of Toxic Family Members
Having problems with family members does not necessarily mean they are toxic. Relationship problems are normal and can often be solved by honest communication and problem-solving. One question to ask yourself is, “Is this relationship harming me more than benefiting me?” If the relationship is more harmful, it may be toxic.
Two key characteristics of toxic family members is that they are:
1) Dishonest
2) Unwilling to accept any responsibility for their behaviors
Because of their unwillingness to take responsibility, it is difficult to repair relationships with them. Setting boundaries/limits is crucial. Part 3 of this article will discuss boundaries and other coping ideas in more detail.
Here are other common characteristics of toxic family members:
- Cause stress, anxiety, anger, confusion, exhaustion, and self-doubt in others.
- Can make you feel like you are going crazy or that you are the victim of a psychopath trying to manipulate and control you.
- Their behaviors are severely affecting your life and health.
- Unlikely to understand how other people feel, or to even care.
- Self-centered and emotionally dependent.
- Extremely negative and critical.
- Financially irresponsible.
- Feel entitled.
- Manipulative.
- Disrespectful.
- Emotionally abusive bullies.
- Adept at sensing your weaknesses and will use them against you.
- Passive aggressive (Passive aggression is “non-verbal aggression that manifests in negative behavior. Instead of openly expressing how they feel, someone makes subtle, annoying gestures directed at you. Instead of saying what’s actually upsetting them, they find small and petty ways to take jabs at you until you pay attention and get upset”
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